2012

With the world ending on December 21, I'll have to work extra hard in 2012 to have as much fun and be as decadent as possible. While in London, I bought a small book (that I've since loaned to a friend, so I can't remember the name)that offered up a bevy of possible after-life scenarios. Some were far-fetched, like the ones that mused that we humans are some sort of space alien experiment. I really hope that isn't the case, otherwise the Scientologists are correct on some level. I would really hate that. In any case, the story that I would like to actually be the case is the one that suggests that the after-life looks a lot like life right now, except it is only populated by people we know. The author didn't really venture what the level of "knowing" had to be obtained before we showed up in someone else's after life. I was quite keen on this scenario, because as a teacher, I meet a lot of people (if if some of them are assholes). Also, I've held a number of jobs and have done a fair amount of traveling and have had the extraordinary chance to meet many wonderful people. If the after-life is indeed peopled only by those we know AND if the Mayans are correct and the world will end on December 21 and all of us are going to the after-life at the same time, I better get busy on meeting as many folks as I can so I have an active social life in the the after-life.

Having said all of that, for the year 2012, I hereby resolve the following:

I resolve to visit at least two cities I have never visited before.
I resolve to try to catch a few movies at the Detroit Film Theatre, even if I have to go alone and to try and engage someone in conversation.
I resolve to do yoga once a week and to hit the gym once a week.
I resolve to attend the MOTH story slams once a month.
I resolve to compliment a stranger at least once a week.
I resolve to clean the toilet bowl once a week.
I resolve to have people over to my house once a month.
I resolve to try two new recipes a month.
I resolve to take Andrew on monthly field trips to cool places.
I resolve to dance a little bit every day, even in public.
I resolve to gently cut negative people of of my life. But to be empathetic to their plight.
I resolve to write and read more.
I resolve to find an agent for my book.
I resolve to walk whenever possible.
I resolve to buy fresh flowers once a week.
I resolve to meditate at least twice a week.

That looks like quite a bit. But I must say, I have been thinking about this list for a while and I truly feel like these are realistic. I even feel like they won't feel like chores to achieve.

I feel pretty good about the world not ending, but if I do much of this on my list, I'll feel okay if it does.

My End of the Year List

I know that all serious pundits and news outlets compile end of the year lists, and I take myself quite serious, so why shouldn't I put together a little list. I haven't spent much time thinking about these...nonetheless, I feel that my list is quite accurate and irrefutable. Can I get a drum roll, please?



Thank you. Here are my big moments for 2011...

Sad News of the Year

Of course, the loss of my father was the saddest event of the year.

Biggest Adjustment of the Year

Living without Andrew on a daily basis. I want to be able to hear his laugh and squeeze him whenever I want.

Best Decision of the Year

The decision to co-parent was a no brainer. I think that these first few months of the divorce have been easier on Andrew because his father and I actively choose to cooperate and to work as a team for Andrew.

Purchase of the Year

The Mini, as if there could be another.

Concert of the Year

I know that many of you might think that the Rochester Castle show will be my choice, but it's not! I choose, instead, the June 11 Squeeze warm-up gig at the Pelton Arms. Small venue, big smile from my singer as I walk in, and the guys blow the roof off the house. That perfomance cannot be topped.

Night of the Year

Monday, April 4 - Evanston, Illinois.

Student Quote of the Year

About an assignment for which students had to find two obituaries, someone said, "So both of them have to be about dead people?"

Road Trip of the Year

London! London! London!

Drink of the Year

Bailey's

Deadly Sin of the Year

This was a close race, but sloth beats out lust, though just barely.


Accomplishment of the Year

Publishing my first short story.

Discovery of the Year

I am stronger and more capable than I had ever believed.

Memo to self

I've just finished watching The Joy Luck Club with my English 12 class. I had forgotten what a good movie it was, but how vastly different it is from the book. I don't wish to quibble with those changes (though my students did NOT appreciate the changes at all). Instead, for the past two days, a line from the movie has been echoing in my head. Rose's mother tells her that she must remember what she is worth. I am pretty guilty of not remembering my worth. All too often in our society, we value monetary worth far over any other kind. I know, however, that I am worth far more than my paycheck quantifies. Perhaps I am overwrought with work-related stress, but I feel a need to remind myself of my worth.

1. I am worthy of respect and dignity.
2. I am worthy of time to just plain relax.
3. I am worthy of friends who will support me.
4. I am worthy of friends who will visit me in my home.
5. I am worth of a clean house.
6. I am worthy of a few pages of fun reading every night.
7. I am worthy of the effort to drop a few pounds.
8. I am worthy of being told I am beautiful.
9. I am worthy of being shown that I am desirable.
10. I am worthy of a few road trips.
11. I am worthy of forgiving myself for my daily boo-boos.
12. I am worthy of my dream.
13. I am worthy of my son's smiles and hugs.
14. I am worthy of the opportunity to play my music loudly.
15. I am worthy of peace and quiet.

Well, that's more like it. I even feel a little light just having written that.

Serious questions

Every year, I suffer the same Christmas conundrums and usually bail on finding an acceptable answer by doing nothing. Now that I'm starting fresh, I want to put these questions out for the general public to chew on and see what comes out of the process.

I should start off by stating that I'm pretty much an atheist and so don't buy the whole virgin birth story. For me, the Christmas holiday is...odd. I've mentioned a number of times that I don't really see my family and when we were kids the adults had a falling out and we all never really recovered from that. Therefore, while I enjoy my cousins (the non-racist ones) we never see each other. Since I've moved to Canada, I have one friend who will regularly visit me. I'll try to fix that this year, but everybody always has some bullshit excuse, so I'm a little cynical. I love to cook, so I use the holiday to indulge in that little hobby.

My first conundrum involves cards. I like the concept of cards. I love the idea of getting something in the mail that doesn't involve marketing and or bill paying. However, I haven't sent cards in a few years. I know, I'm a bad person. I am going to send cards this year, so here's the question: do people really want to receive a picture of other people's kids? I know that my son is absolutely the most perfect and handsome boy in the world, but do people really want his picture in the Christmas card? If yes, should it be a school picture or a more fun and spontaneous shot?

Second question involves that ages old problem, when are gifts exchanged in a new relationship? I'm not even sure I'm in a relationship, but I am occasionally sharing someone's bed. Does that mean I should get him a small gift? Am I off the hook if he's flat broke? If I even ask him, is that tacky? Too much pressure?

Final Christmas conundrum, the Santa issue. I never really cared if Andrew ever believed in Santa, but he does believe. I hate lying to him and I just wonder if I let it runs its course? Eventually, he will stop believing on his own, he is in second grade. How do I explain to my the-world-is-black-and-white son that the whole Santa thing is fake, or can I punt the whole issue to his dad, who was a little more pro-Santa than me?

Thanks for listening. If you've got any ideas, let me know.

I shouldn't really be surprised

Yesterday's elections gave rationale and progressive people a few victories last night. In Michigan, we saw the recall of Paul Scott, who gave us the bill that basically through tenure out the window. He was also the chair for the Education committee for the House of Representatives in Lansing. As chair, he would have been presiding over the public comments hearing about a bill that would have lifted the numerical cap of charter schools in the state of Michigan. In Michigan, the majority of charter schools are operated by for-profit companies. Needless to say, both of the teachers' unions and most public school districts are adamantly against this bill. My union president asked me if I would like to go to Lansing and testify before the committee. I was thrilled and I have to admit that speaking before form of a legislative body is a bucket list item.

This morning, with testimony (and 30 copies) in hand, I drove to our state capitol. Sadly, my drive was in vain, as it turns out that the committee chair is busy licking his wounds and cancelled the hearing. That's really too bad, because I had somethings to tell them.

November 9, 2011
Good morning and thank you for allowing me to speak before you today on a topic of great importance: the lifting of the charter school cap, a notion I believe to be a very bad idea.
I have taught at Hamtramck High School (go Cosmos!) since 1997. In those 14 years, Hamtramck’s 2.2 square miles has become home to five charter schools, in addition to the seven schools operated by Hamtramck Public Schools. Twelve schools in 2.2 square miles is an astonishing number. It seems there has been no cap in Hamtramck, so I believe that I am uniquely qualified to tell the committee and the public what we can expect if the charter school cap is lifted.
We can expect to see an increase in de facto re-segregation of the American school system. This has already been the case in Hamtramck. The Greater Detroit Community Development Group met earlier this year with the superintendent of Hamtramck schools to discuss the possibility of Hamtramck Public Schools authorizing their proposed charter. It was explained in the meeting (I have attached a copy of the minutes along with a newspaper article) that the organization would target Bengali families specifically to enrol at the new school. How is that even possible? It is as if Brown v. Board never happened and taxpayer money will be spent on schools that look to cater to one ethnic group. Who is holding these organizations accountable?
We can expect to see a widening of the practice of not teaching what is not measured by AYP. A few years ago, I met a fourth grade teacher from a charter school in Hamtramck. After she asked me if there were any jobs in the schools, I asked her about a rumor about her school. We had heard that her school did not teach social studies (history) and frankly, report cards from students transferring to the public schools showed no social studies mark. She confirmed it and said that seeing as AYP was only measuring reading and math, social studies was dropped. Who is holding these schools accountable?
We can expect to see more schools that don’t provide even the most rudimentary basics, as a student of mine vividly details in a sheet I’ve also attached. She asked to remain anonymous, but I will tell you that she and her sister (who graduated last year) are two of the brightest young ladies I have ever taught. She quite plainly states that for two years, she didn’t even have a locker. In two years, she never used a textbook that was remotely close to new. But, that particular school offers Arabic, so I guess I can guess who their target audience is. Who is holding these schools accountable?
We can expect to see more schools that demand that their teachers use a script, as was the case of a former student of mine. Last year, she taught at a charter school that gave its teachers scripts and teachers were routinely reprimanded and written up if they were not at the appointed spot on the script at the appointed time. That school had a heavy ESL population and no ESL program. Who is holding these schools accountable?
We can expect to see more parents, especially those not born and raised in the United States, confused about the actual standing of charter schools. I have seen banners on a number of charter schools that proclaim them to offer “free tuition.” This subtly deceptive practice is bound to confuse a parent who comes from a poverty-stricken third world country where an education was the privilege of the wealthy, not a right for all citizens. Even my student who wrote of her charter school experience calls it a private charter school, underscoring the confusion that exists. Who is holding these schools accountable?

We can expect more parents to be told that there is no room in the school and that their child will be placed on a waiting list (after count day). My school doesn’t have a waiting list. Who is holding these schools accountable?
We can expect more special needs students to be told that there isn’t a program to help them, as has been the case of so many of our special education students. Who is holding these schools accountable?
No one is holding these charter schools accountable. For the most part, for-profit management corporations operate them. No democratically elected school boards. No open meetings. No books that can be accessed by any taxpayer who has the gumption.
Is it this legislative body’s intention to give taxpayers’ money to entities that are unaccountable to taxpayers? Is that the mission you have be given by taxpayers? Are schools that are unaccountable to taxpayers and ordinary citizens really what’s best for children? A lack of special services, “waiting lists,” deceptive marketing practices, scripts, a lack of basic supplies, no social studies, and de facto re-segregation? I don’t think so. Keep the cap and hold these schools accountable.

The woman from my union's office listened to me and she told me that my story needed to be told and that she'd let me know when the hearing would be re-scheduled. I plan on showing up and telling this tale.

A really cute story

I just have to share this before I start grading papers for the evening. There is one young lady who is the first to arrive in my first hour class everyday. Class starts at 7:52 and she is there at 7:30ish every morning. Seeing her absolutely puts a smile on my face as she is a real sweetheart who is working hard to do well in class.

Anyway, she was putting the finishing touches on an anti-bullying poster that she was to turn to turn into me (a unit on persuasive techniques and appeals) when she called my name, "Ms Coral?"

"Yeah, T_____?"

"I never ever tell people things like this, but...I have a really big crush on a boy in this class." She shyly smiled and glanced away from me.

I knew immediately how honored I was at that moment. "Can I guess?" I asked. She nodded. "D______?"

"Yeah," she blushed.

I grabbed an imaginary key, locked my lips, and tossed away the key. "I'll never tell." She smiled again and went back to work on her project and then left to grab a little breakfast.

It's just such a cool feeling when a student gives you a little happy glimpse into her world like that.

I cried twice today

I do not like to cry in front of my students, but it happened twice today.

The first time was the fault of A.S. in my AP Literature and Composition. We've just finished a study of elements of fiction and are now transitioning into poetry. The class's first assignment was to read the introductory chapter on poetry. In class, they annotated the poem and several students volunteered to read the poem aloud and share their annotation. Well A.S. read John Updike's Dog's Death. I had purposely skipped over this selection in the chapter because I am a softie and I knew I would cry. Well he read it and I cried. I pulled together my composure to add more to the conversation we started last week about Frankenstein.

The second set of tears fell at the end of the day, just as Student Council members arrived to put the final touches on Homecoming. I opened my email and discovered that the October issue of RED OCHRE LiT has been published and there was my name. I clicked on my name and I just couldn't help myself. At that moment I had to let go of a lifetime of self-doubt and I had gotten so used to living with it. It has been my shield, my wall. I need to let that go now. The world is such a different place without my own fears holding me back.

And it happened like this

In the spring, one Chris Difford was soliciting some stories about imaginary friends. I believe that his intentions were to use those stories in a show. I thought nothing of it because I had never had an imaginary friend (unless you count fantasies about...never mind). The idea stuck around in my head and I found a story creeping down to my fingers. It turned into a story about an imaginary meeting with my son's birth mother. Through many tears I composed it and sent it to Chris. I don't know if he ever got it, but I put it away for a while. The subject shook me so heavily that I sobbed every time I read it.

Late in the summer, I realized that my writing had come to a grinding halt and I needed to leap out of the rut I had dug. I pulled out this short story. I fixed some words and sent it to a couple of magazines, including RED OCHRE LiT.

One magazine rejected it quite quickly. Then, I heard back from RED OCHRE LiT, from an intern who like the piece and asked a few questions for clarification. Immediately my hopes soared. I tried to stay realistic about the story, as I know that sometimes it can take weeks if not months to hear back from publishers and publications.

Today at lunch, I checked my email. I saw that RED OCHRE LiT had sent me a message. I covered my eyes, peeked through my fingers, and opened the message. It said congratulations, we love the story and want to publish it! It went on to tell me that they will get back to me about the specifics (publication date, any small changes, etc.). None of that matters at the moment. All I can think about is that some strangers, whose business is to publish literature, like my writing.

Is anyone listening?

Dear Presidents of the NEA and the AFT,

I have just started my 16th year of teaching and yet I wish with all of my might that this were my last year. I desperately wish that the nation's economy were in much better condition so I could change my career. I feel that the politics surrounding education have been so toxic that there is no turning back.

Here is Michigan, tenure has been thrown by the wayside, all collective bargaining has been legislated away, we are on the verge of becoming a "right-to-work" state with a privatized teaching core. None of these actions relate in any way to actual research on best teaching practices or incorporating much needed social services in our poorest schools. Nope, this is all about destroying unions and decreasing salaries and about turning schools over to private corporations so they have captive markets and can reap all that taxpayer money.

But, down deep, you already know that. So, what are we to do? Are we to continue to try and compromise with an opponent whose demagoguery is driven by some odd combination of the Chicago School of Economics philosophy (the one that killed Allende, brought Pinochet to power, and drove Chile to its knees) and religious fanaticism that believes that Jesus today would spit on the poor? People who cheer at the thought of an uninsured person's death? People who listen to a radio announcer who called a 13 year Chelsea Clinton a dog? People who knowingly lied about weapons of mass destruction? Can one actually reason with and compromise with people like these? I don't think so. But, we keep trying - like good teachers who try to reach that angry student who is about to give up. Sadly, it isn't working.

I am not the only teacher who feels like this. There are many and we are looking to you for your leadership in making this happen. You see, we trench-working teachers are busy with lesson plans and marking papers. You and the leadership of the two unions have time for this task, so I beseech you to do the following:

CALL A STRIKE! CALL A STRIKE! CALL A STRIKE!

Shut the schools down for a few days. Flex our muscles. Show them that we have come to the fight prepared to win or at least not go down with a whimper. Call it and we will follow - I promise.

I'll be damned if I lose my job in three years (that is the time frame) without fighting back.

CALL A STRIKE!

A winner and a dilemma

Okay, my kids voted on the car names today and now I have a dilemma.

They voted for an anonymously nominated name and so now there's no winner. I wasn't thinking and accidentally included the name and now it's won. The winner is Toni's Pony. I'd much rather go with a name that was actually nominated by someone with a name. I suppose I could tell the kids one thing and still announce the name of the second place winner - nominated by someone who attached a name to it.

I want to be honest, but I also want to crown a winner. Oh, why can't I make things easy on myself?

First day

Even after 16 years on the job, I still get first day jitters. I know that my brain is still partially in summer mode and the kids' brains will be more than partially stuck in summer. I study over mostly faceless names and I hope that I pronounce them correctly as names are important.

This year is going to be hectic. I have five unique classes that I am teaching, which means 10-15 hours of planning a week. That's 10-15 hours of my own time. That doesn't count the number of papers I always grade. And, let's not even mention the political atmosphere surrounding public education. That all just depresses me.

First days are usually uneventful. Everyone approaches the day with just a little trepidation and even the most reluctant student makes noises about turning over a new leaf. I rattle my sabre and try to show them that my class will make them smarter, but only if they give their full effort.

Today was really no different that most other first days. A lot of kids were missing because those are the types of kids I teach. Maybe they'll show up tomorrow, or next week. Whenever their parents get around to sending them. Far too many show up without even a pencil. Three 10th graders tried to sleep in my seventh hour class. The majority, however, were polite and tried to put their best foot forward; "please" and "thank you" were abundantly used today.

Problems? For two of my classes, the 35 desks in my room are not enough. One student sat at my desk, while another sat at my work table in the front of the room. We'll have to fix that. How? I don't know. There is no more room for student desks in my room. Adding more would be a fire hazard.

I'm tired and drinking a little Zen green tea as I still have work to do this evening. I've already put in an two extra hours, between before school and since the school day ended. I still have about 45 minutes more to go. I guess I better get to it.

Humor is a funny thing

I really want Andrew to like Bugs Bunny. I know that at age seven, I was in love with cartoons and especially loved both Bugs and Rocky and Bullwinkle. Of course, unlike this mean mom, my mother let us watch television.

I won't go into all the reason why I chose to not have a television and why I haven't let Andrew watch any television since we adopted him. I will say that, considering the repetitive language he exhibits, I am glad that I made that choice. I would rather hear the same inane facts about trucks or rocks that he learned from a book than the inane script of some television show.

Having said that, a primary component of autism is social awkwardness. I don't want him to be ostracized, so one thing that we (both his father and I) have decided is okay is monitored doses of YouTube. If it were solely up to Andrew, we would only watch truck videos, with an occasional train video thrown in for variety. What we have tried to do is show him bits and pieces of movies and older cartoons, to try and broaden his horizons.

That hasn't gone as well as I had hoped. I was positive that Bugs would leave him in stitches. It didn't. He doesn't even find Mr Bean particularly funny. I tried that today and his response, "This isn't funny." Man, I thought it would be right up a seven year old's alley.

The problem with humor and autism is that many autistic people see the world in very black and white tones. Humor is gray. For example, we went to the library and, of course, we checked out some non-fiction truck books. But, evil English teacher mom that I am, I insisted that he check out three fiction books that he can use to practice reading and interacting with literary techniques (all gray area concepts). He chose a book titled Recess Riddles. Each page has a kid friendly joke and a picture that helps re-enforce the punchline. My favorite joke was this one:

Why is the library the tallest part of the school?
Because it has so many stories.

Now, maybe I'm a very simple soul, but I chuckled while my child stared dumbfounded at the page. He did find the picture of the towering books to be mildly funny. I should explain that he knows all the meanings of "story": a) a narrative and b)a floor in a building. When I spent about five minutes explaining that it was a play on words, all he said was "Oh, word play. Okay." The rest of the book followed suit.

Let's face it, jokes and humor are nothing but figurative language; puns, metaphors, etc. And, perhaps there are plenty of seven year olds who haven't been allowed to watch television who wouldn't get that joke. For me, it's a reminder to keep my extremely sarcastic side in check. It's a reminder of the million and one lessons I need to share with my son. Perhaps, this is why he told me today, three times even, that I need a flat screen television here at my new place. I don't want one, but, if it helps him be less of an outsider, I'd have to consider it.

For the record, Andrew regularly laughs at all sorts of things. As far as popular culture, he thinks the Road Runner and Wile E. Coyote are pretty funny.

Name this car and win!

Ships get names all the time. If I'm to trust Wikipedia, the tradition has existed for thousands of years. It seems that the ancients chose names that would protect the sailors.

It stands to reason that, seeing as most of us will never be sailors, our ancestors, who still reside in our souls, should urge us to name our current mode of transportation - our cars. I have known many people who have named their cars. I think my dad would call each of his cars Bessie - though I don't know why. A former student named her car Bob. I, on the other hand, have never named a car. All of the cars I have owned have been the lowest end model, a mere utilitarian vehicle to get from point A to Point B. I have, however, just purchased a new (to me) car. A 2009 Mini Cooper S. It is my dream car. I have wanted a Mini since it was re-introduced to the North American market. I am in superficial consumer heaven.

Because this car is so special to me, I think it deserves a name. So, I am asking you, my loyal and international readers to help me decide on a name. All you have to do is leave a comment here (not on FB, Twitter, or Google+) with your suggested name. I will then ask my sixth hour English 12 class to choose from all the suggestions. If I have a way to get a hold of you, I will email you, get your address, and send you a small prize.

RULES
1. If you are related to me - don't enter.
2. If you are a current student - don't enter.
3. Only names posted here on the blog are valid.
4. Deadline - Wednesday, September, September 7 11:59 EST.

Here it is - hope you feel inspired.

Things 23 - the end of my journey!

As I started this course, I was a little concerned that it was going to be too simple for me. Also, my district just cannot get its act together. That interactive white board that has been on the wall of my room since March? Still inoperable. The version of Microsoft Office on the computer in my room. Maybe '98? Anything I type on my laptop I must save as an RTF or it won't open at school.

I have, however, learned a number of wonderful things. My favorite is the tip about saving Delicious tags. Just that tidbit alone was well worth taking this class. My other favorite bit was the lesson on podcasts. I hadn't yet waded into that pool of information delivery, but I absolutely will use the vocabulary podcast I found. All I need is my iPod and speakers. Not even my district can screw those things up.

I still see technology through the lens of my economically and vision deprived district. What I do see, as I stand on the cusp on what will be a daunting school year, is that I will have to share my own knowledge and continue to push for change. I will urge others to take this worthwhile class.

I just re-read Steve Hargadon's article and I still find it entirely too full of Kool-Aid consumption. It is impossible to deny the importance Web 2.0 has played in movements like the Arab Spring, it is also impossible to overstate the importance of face-to-face contact, or the mostly despicable comments found at the end of any article on any newspaper site. One glance at those reveals that there are a lot of "pro-sumers' out there who are interested only in their own ignorance and hatred and sharing that with the world.

How will I continue to learn about Web 2.0? I will follow the trends and ask the kids :)

Things 21 and 22

Of the Wikis that I browsed, my favorite was Book Trailers for Readers. That gave me an idea for an end of the year project for my combined English 12/Honors English 12 class. I think they'll be making book trailers.

Anyway, the only obstacle that I have to overcome is the time crunch issue. I've mentioned before that I have five preps this year and, to be honest, I'm already feeling stressed as I try to start lesson plans. I don't think PB works is blocked because another teacher has a wiki.

I had wanted to start a wiki for a while, so I did so earlier in the summer, long before I realized that I would need to do so for this course. My wiki, Books Are Good is obviously still under construction. The big difference between it and a blog is that I can train kids how to upload material to this and they can work collaboratively on projects using a wiki. That's still the part with which I need to become familiar, but I have people who can help me.

A blog for a student is still more appropriate for his/her own thoughts. I would hate for a wiki discussion board to become a spot for competitive students or malcontents to try and mar someone else's reputation or work. I can see that happening. As long as blogspot is blocked, I might keep the Yahoo! group going for my AP class.

Thing 20

I love the idea of using podcasts in class. I think it will connect with the kids because for many of them, information from a podcast is "different" from a boring old lecture. I'll be the cool kid on the block just for using them occasionally.

I went to EPN and searched for Language Arts podcasts. I mentioned in my last post that I wanted to find a podcast about writing. I didn't find one, but I did find one prefect vocabulary in my AP Literature class.

Then I visited Podcast Alley only to learn that the site was doing some maintenance work and thus could not open any podcasts. Sigh.

Okay, on to iTunes. Good news - Just Vocabulary is available through iTunes, so it is my first subscription. Then I checked out Grammar Girl. I was immediately disappointed that there was an ad in the very beginning. Once I got over that, the content was really quite informative. So I subscribed to this one, too.

I found one writing podcast and it was really addressing some advanced issues. I might check out more of its shows, but right now, it's a pass.

I didn't really prefer one search venue over the other. I have to go back and try Podcast Alley. All I know is that I'm looking forward to trying some of these in my classroom.

I Humbly Submit My CV For Your Consideration

Dear George Clooney,

First of all, let me offer you my deepest sympathies on your recent break up with your girlfriend of two years. A quick look at this list is quite impressive. Let's face it, all of your paramours have been HOT. If I were a lesbian, I'd hook up with any of them. But, I'm not gay. What I am is a simple mid-west girl who teaches high school in...well, I'll just say Detroit because it's easier for now. I explain it better over drinks.

I want to suggest something that maybe others have not. I want to suggest that perhaps you keep choosing the wrong girl. As someone who is considered one of the sexiest men alive , you have a reputation to uphold. But have you ever considered that these uber-beautiful women are, perhaps a little high maintenance? I know they look great on the red carpet, but you've been through a bunch of them.

Consider, you're a guy from the mid-west, Cincinnati, right? Despite the house in Italy, perhaps you're still deeply, emotionally rooted in mid-west values. I know those values well: loyal friendships, rooting for the home team (not the new one, but the first home team), backyard BBQs washed down with a beer. I could be wrong, I don't know you at all.

Have you ever thought about a little experiment? You could insure that your next girlfriend doesn't want to be a model, reality t.v. star, or actress. For this experiment, I offer myself as the guinea pig. I do NOT want to be on television. Sure, I want to publish my novel, but I'd be happy if a dozen strangers bought it. You probably want to know about me before you make this major decision. Let me help you here.

My politics are very liberal. I'm a former elected official in my union. Politics are a bad habit for me. From what I've read about you, we both hate Fox News. Plus, I'm a high school teacher who is also the student council adviser at the school. I walk the walk, not just talk the talk (sorry for the cliche) and I think you might appreciate that.

I have to admit, that I probably need to lose 10 pounds. I'm not nearly as svelte as your past lovers. But, there will never be rumors that I have have an eating disorder and I'm an excellent cook. I like experimenting in the kitchen. I am, however, a vegetarian. Thought you should know.

I am not high maintenance. I don't require enormous amounts of jewels or other sparkly things. Sure, sometimes those goodies are nice, but they aren't me. I like a pair of simple, elegant earrings, a complimentary necklace, and maybe a small ring. I don't mind getting clothes from secondhand stores because it's better for the environment. The clearance rank is my best shopping friend. I do have a boot addiction. I have nice shapely legs, so that's an addiction you'll enjoy.

Speaking of enjoy, let's just have a brief discussion about sex. I like it and have been greatly deprived lately. That means I will be very generous and overly grateful. Very generous.

You have said several times that you do not want to get married. I'm cool with that. All I would want is a happy, reasonably monogamous relationship. I say reasonable because there is a certain singer (Glenn Tilbrook), who if he ever gave me the eye, I couldn't say no. Besides, I'm sure women aggressively throw themselves at you all the time. We can negotiate this point.

As for children, I have a seven year old son. He is mildly autistic. His father is actively involved in his life, on a daily basis. My son is the bright star in my sky. If you don't hate kids, you'll really like him.

Look, I'm pretty cute, I'm refuse to worry about grey hair and crows' feet. I like concerts, reading and taking long walks. I wear myself on my sleeve. I think you need a simple gal, so why not me?

Thing 19

Last year, I asked our district tech department about podcasts. I had listened to a couple and thought that it would be cool and relevant if my students could create their own podcasts. I am sorry to say that I received several blank stares. I quietly excused myself, backed out of the room, and returned to my room - where I laid my head on my desk and silently wept for not having thrown caution to the wind and become a rock n'roll photographer, salary and sleep deprivation be damned.

For some reason, I was unable to watch either of the RESA podcasts on my laptop (told myself to watch them at the ex's later in the week), so I went directly to the third link.

The first podcast I watched was the Sesame Street on about language acquisition. I suppose because as the mom on a mildly autistic mom, repetitive language is a daily struggle. He has grown up with two teachers, so his receptive language is pretty impressive, but he struggles with his expressive language, though he has come a long way in the past year.

Additionally, a large number of my students were not born in this country and thus come from an English as Second Language background. Many of them do not speak English at home and, thanks to satellite television, only hear it at school. I've struggled for a few years with an effective way to handle vocabulary. I guess I just have to surround my high school students with vocabulary in the same manner I did my adopted-from-China-didn't-know-he-was autistic son. Don't talk down to them, be diligent about my word wall, and keep reading the research.

The second one I watched was for pure pleasure because I needed a Glenn Tilbrook fix. I can't really talk about it publicly, but I have secret plans to make him mine ;)

The final one I found was a series of four about the History of Photography. This is the great passion of my life and I'm always looking to know more about it. Of course, I was drawn in to it due to the iconic Dorothea Lange "Migrant Mother" photograph.

I still want my students to make a podcast and it would be great to find some podcasts about the craft of writing and maybe I can share those with my students. I'll save that search for thing 20.

Thing 18

Yet another useful site that can be used to eliminate student excuses. slideshare is a site where one can upload a PowerPoint presentation and share it publicly. No more, "I forgot my flash drive" or "it won't open on your computer." If this site isn't blocked and I can open it on my laptop, the presentation is saved. It also gives me the opportunity to go back and look at a presentation for things I might have missed, for example spelling mistakes.

I'm not sure how I would use this outside of the classroom. I'm not in a position where I make presentations - ever. I suppose if I found myself in a situation where I needed to make a presentation, uploading it to this site would be a back-up measure. I certainly could do research on the site. Without the speaker, the presentation loses a little something.

Because the subject of autism is near and dear to my heart, I searched for a presentation about it. I found one called "Working with Autistic Spectrum Disorder children in the classroom." I liked it because it offered me gentle reminders on how to work with my son when the frustration level rises. Plus, let's face it, autistic kids are in our classrooms, and they have a right to be there. There are some estimates that show that 1 out of every 100 children are on the spectrum. That number is even higher for boys. As teachers, we need to be ready for the challenges that will arise when these kids, even mild like my son, are mainstreamed into our classrooms. Here's the presentation.

Dealing With Autism Presentation

View more presentations from guestf46b4

Thing 17

Okay, I loved this assignment! Aside from Open Office, I didn't really realize that there were so many on-line productivity tools - and without downloading them.

For my students, I really like Zoho Show. Like Google Docs and group assignments, this site eliminates just one more excuse for not doing an assignment. As long as this site isn't blocked at school, a student with a computer at home cannot tell me that he/she doesn't have PowerPoint, so a poster board will have to do. I have to play with it more as I didn't make an account. I need to know if presentations can be made public so others can look at them, making grading a little easier.

I think I will more than likely sign up for Remember the Milk. For one thing, the cow logo is too cute. More importantly, I can get reminders in email and on Twitter. This, in addition to my phone, should be tremendously helpful.

I made an account at LibraryThing. This site could become my new obsession. At the moment, I can't think of a relevant school application, but personally, the sky is the limit. I like the idea of connecting with other readers who are avid enough to register at a site like this. I will have to be careful with my time.

Thing 16

I was lucky enough to be involved with the National Writing Project at Eastern Michigan last summer. One of the other teachers involved did a presentation on how she used Google Docs with her students. Our whole cohort went on to use it to compose our response letters for all the presentations. Since then, I've incorporated Google Docs in a few ways.

Aside from my teaching duties, I am also the Student Council adviser. In the past year, the Student Council Executive Board has started saving important documents and forms in Google Docs. This means that more eyes can proofread and fix right away (saving paper in these cash-strapped days) and eliminating the need for a floating flash drive.

On a personal level, I used it mainly for two reason. The first is for a novel that I wrote. I have the complete manuscript saved there until some publisher sees just how brilliant it is. The other reason occurred after my dad passed away in January. He had a gazillion recipes typed up and my mother wanted me to delete all of them. Before I did so, I saved many of them to Google Docs, I guess as a reminder of my dad.

The biggest issue is, as always, overcoming my school district's policies. Currently, students are prohibited from accessing their email at school. While part of me understands the policy, it is hopelessly out of touch with how students actually work. I can, however, urge them to use Google Docs when faced with a group assignment. Inevitably, someone is absent and THAT person has all of the work. If everything is save in Google Docs, no need to worry.

With colleagues, I can see working on common assessments or assignments using Google Docs. Again, it makes proofreading easier and it spreads the typing load around as everyone can alter the document and leave notes about about was done.

Thing 15

I think that this has been (after the photograph assignments) my favorite. All of the other assignments didn't really present me with new information. This one was a whole bunch of new.

As I feared when I subscribed to some of those sites, I had not had time to read most of them. But, give me a break, I just moved out of my old house into my own place. It's been a busy and emotional few weeks. Thus, I was pretty glad to learn of the manage subscriptions link. I immediately pared down my subscriptions.

Even better was the knowledge that I could subscribe to Delicious TAGS! I am not exaggerating when I say that this knowledge will have an immediate positive impact on my life. The first two subscriptions were to a"writing lesson plans" tag and an "American literature." Now, I just have to read through them and save the ones I like myself.

Google reader will now become a habit.

Thing 14

As I mentioned in the previous post, I have had a Delicious account for a couple of years now. What prompted that move was a dying computer. I wanted desperately to save my bookmarks and somewhere, probably NPR, I had heard about Delicious, so I checked it out and it saved me many tears.

My username is TeacherToni (very original - don't you think?). I think I can use Delicious in my teaching by sharing my links with my students on my newly formed Wiki. Of course, I might need to arrange them so that only my school related links are public. Currently, all of my links are public only because I hadn't thought to make any of them private. It's not as if I have salacious sites saved to my Delicious account.

Does it enhance my productivity? I think so, it cuts down on my Google time because I've saved so many useful sites. Again, unlike clutter in my living room, my virtual clutter is out-of-control. I don't see it, so I think about it less. Just another job on the neverending to do list.

Thing 13

I guess that I don't have too many thoughts about tagging, except that I need to do a better job of it. I also guess that how one tags an item depends greatly on how that item will be used. If it's basically for myself, any old way (or ways) will work. On the other hand, if I'm tagging for other people, I have to keep audience (like a good writer) in mind. What will be the most useful way to help direct people to what I hope they find? I think that I mildly lamented that I needed to do a better job tagging my blog entries if I want to generate more traffic.

I have a Delicious account and I know that I need to get in there and better organize my bookmarks. I also need to get into my Flickr account and organize those, too. That way, If I want to connect with other like minded people (let's say Squeeze fans on Flickr) they can more easily find my pictures that relate to our common interests. Perhaps I can do some of that tonight.

Thing 12

My blog already had a couple of widgets (or gadgets as blogspot calls them). Earlier this spring I added the visit counter and when I started the blog I immediately added a Picasso of the Day and a blog roll. I don't like to clutter my blog up with too many bells and whistles. I don't want to distract from the writing.

The second I saw the list of possible widgets, I knew exactly which one I would add - the Clustrmap. I just love knowing who is reading my blog, even if people are not leaving comments. I gives me a sense of a real audience.

I do believe that real relationships can be formed on-line. On Facebook, I have a "friend" from Australia, whom I met through someone I met once at a concert in Cleveland. All three of us love the same band. All three of us are English majors. I have met up with the person in Cleveland and will continue to do so. The woman in Australia? I don't know that I'll ever meet her face to face, but we interact and enjoy each others on-line personalities, which in my case is very much like my real life personality.

Why do students like sites like Facebook? It feeds their social animal on many different levels. First of all, everyone gets to see how popular you is with how many friends you have. Secondly, you might have a random thought that you post as your status. Someone else might do something as simple as "like" it and you get a little gratification that someone out there is paying attention. Even I get that feeling of I'm not alone and someone is "listening."

Thing 11

I actively encountered my first blog after the 2004 presidential election. I was hurt and angry and confused and felt pretty damn alone in the world. I had heard about the Daily Kos, a left-leaning political site,during the election. When I finally visited the site, I found kindred spirits. But the site is so big, I felt as if my voice was continually drowned out by bigger political junkies than me, so I moved on. By spring of 2005, I had found Booman Tribune and it has been my political blog home ever since. I've written diaries there, I have left a number of comments over the years. I have also made a number of real life friends because of that blog

I have a number of friends who maintain blogs. I wish I had time to comment everyday. I don't feel nervous about making comments. Perhaps because I found the tips in the article to be pretty much common sense. But, for people who are new to blogging, the tips are perfect.

I wish that this blog had more traffic. I think perhaps I need to do a better job of tagging my posts. Better labels would provide more Google hits. I love it when a stranger stumbles onto my blog and adds to what had been a soliloquy. It really makes my day.

Things 9 and 10

I created a youtube account perhaps three years ago. It was in response to my inability to email a video to my parents in Florida. My son had done something cute and I had managed to tape the event. I tried several times to attach it to an email, to no avail; the file was simply too large. At the time, I didn't know about gmail, so the only way I could think to the share these videos of their only grandchild was to upload them to youtube. That's worked and since then I've upload concert video and more Andrew video. If anyone is curious, look for tacteacher and you'll find my paltry offerings.

I avoid youtube like the plague. I could get lost in hours of goofy Bugs Bunny clips. I do like to check out new music via youtube. If someone tells me about an artist, I look up a few songs and make up my own mind about the artist. I don use it with Andrew when he wants to look at trains or trucks or airplanes.

Sadly it is blocked in my district. I have asked to have it unblocked on teacher stations, but alas - no. I would love to use it when teaching satire (the Simpsons). I know that there is TeacherTube. I used it this summer to look for rocks and minerals videos for Andrew. It has less content, though I will look at it more extensively as I plan for my classes, especially if that white board is set to go.

As I stated before, I'm in a bit of a sour mood and this song really speaks to that. It is a beautiful live version of one of my all-time favorite songs. Enjoy!

Thing 8

Playing with graphics is new to me. I have never played with Photoshop. I'm not interested in Photoshop enough to devote the time to it. I like my photographs to stand on their own and frankly I think I'm good enough that the images I choose do just that.

I played a bit with the mashups and, aside from the Memory game, I really wasn't all that excited about them. They would be good tools to provide to my students when I assign a multi-media assignment.

The image generators were a bit more fun and I can see wasting many an hour playing on these sites. Again, offering these to my students as tools for assignments is a possibility. The other is for my lecture notes, especially if the interactive white board idly hanging on my wall ever becomes operational (and I get at least a little training). These sites would also be fun if I ever have to make a presentation at a staff meeting - just to loosen up the audience.

With everything going on in Lansing, I've been feeling a bit cynical. Then I found out that I will have five preps for this coming school year. So, when I thought about this assignment, my brain was in a darker place than I normally like. But, I wanted to pay tribute to my new favorite actor, Matt Damon.

Thing 7

As I stated in my post for Thing 6, I have had a Flickr account for several years. Photography is a passion and I have the cutest son in the world, thus I take more pictures than any human should.

I tagged a picture I took in London. It is of the wrong end of a telescope mounted on the hill of the Royal Observatory. All of my pictures are public, so feel free to browse through. They are in no way organized, but I plan on working on that, slowly but surely.

Would I use Flickr in my classroom? Maybe. Or perhaps I would create a Picasa account just for classroom use. I can see myself using it to prompt descriptive writing. Or, if I really had time, I would try to take pictures of outdoor advertising that uses literary techniques. That probably won't happen, but a girl can dream.

Paris Sunset from the Louvre window

Paris Sunset from the Louvre window, a photo by Dimitry B on Flickr.

Thing 6

Okay - now we're talkin'! Photography has been my passion since I was a kid. I remember being eight years old and my parents gave me a a Kodak 110 camera. It was as simple as possible and looked like this



I cried. No, seriously, I cried. Just imagine how emotional I got when I got a Polaroid. Eventually, I learned to develop film and photos. I took pictures for my high school newspaper and even won an honorable mention award mention from Columbia University for a baseball picture I took.

I take a ton of pictures. I've had a Flickr account for a few years. As a matter of fact, I take so many pictures that I pay for the ability to upload an unlimited number of pictures and videos.

I've already uploaded one picture, but that wasn't from Flickr, it was from Google images. My next big European trip will be to Paris, so I searched Paris and found a gorgeous shot of the Louvre. What I didn't know was that Flickr would post it separate from my post. C'est la vie! Enjoy!

Thing 5

I almost missed this one. Good thing I was multi-tasking last night and actually slowed down to re-read the assignments.

Last night, whilst making delicious blueberry jam, I played with RSS subscriptions and Google Reader. Because I was in a canning mood, I searched for food blogs, more specifically, preserving. I'm glad I did that because I found a couple of good spots, one with a divine looking recipe for balsamic blackberry jam (I believe that I have found something to make this weekend).If you like making jams check out this site.

The amount of information can be overwhelming and I wonder if this is a tool I'll start to use and then just drop it when life takes over. I'm not really sure that using RSS can fully mitigate that information overload feeling. I fear that I'll check it once a week and start to feel guilty that I hadn't checked in for a while. Blogs are so personal, that I begin to feel that, as a regular reader, I have a responsibility to regularly support the writer. Heck, I feel guilty if I don't write here more often.

As with everything, I will simply do what I can.

Thing 4

Well, I've recovered nicely from my trip to London, so I guess it's time to finish 23 Things Teachers Need to Know about Web 2.0.

Thing 4 deals with subscribing to favorite blogs or other web-sites. I have to admit that I knew about RSS feeds before completing this lesson. I had chosen not to use them because I was afraid that I would get swamped with too much information. I still kind of feel like that.

I could see using it if my students were keeping blogs. But, unless my school unblocks blogspot, I won't be asking my students to maintain a blog.

On a personal level, when I am looking for something new, I use stumbleupon. Right now, I just add a new site to my delicious bookmarks and check in from time to time. I could just subscribe to the site and receive up-dated information. That would be a more efficient use of my time. Perhaps I will try just that.

London - Day 10 - the last

I'm all packed and showered and ready to head to breakfast just as soon as the restaurant opens. I'm not really sure that my suitcase is going to close, but I'll deal with that in a bit. My cab comes at 9:00 and I'll be back with my beamish boy by 8:00 this evening. I cannot wait. I'm not looking forward to the blast of heat I'll face in Detroit. I know that, at least in my head, I've complained bitterly about London weather, but the idea of wearing a dress, tights, and boots in July really appeals to me. I know how to pack for next time. And there will be a next time!

So how did I keep myself occupied on my final full day in London? I woke up feeling highly unmotivated. I wanted to sit in my room and read all day. But, I can do that anywhere. I decided to see if I could manage to get to South London all on my own, without getting lost. Not surprising, I found myself in Greenwich in no time. There, I visited the National Maritime Museum and walked up the hill to the Royal Observatory. I did not pay to stand on the Prime Meridian line because I needed what little cash I had left for dinner and a walking tour in the evening. The view was spectacular and the sun was even shining for my visit. The museum didn't quite catch my fancy, but I think that I am suffering tourist burn-out, so I won't really state an opinion. There is a dizzying array of maritime artifacts in the museum, some of them quite old.

I spent my evening on a "walk." Well, it would have been a walk if not for the torrential rains that poured down upon us. The walk was to be The Literary London Pub Walk. But the rain was so awful that we quickly landed in a pub where our tour guide delivered all sorts of delicious literary gossip. There were two other American teachers on the tour and we drank wine and complained bitterly about the attacks we are currently enduring. One was from Wisconsin and one was from NYC. I rode the Tube for a bit with a French teacher from Carcassonne. Even there, teachers are treated poorly, with the government trying to increase class size.

That's it. My whole trip. I shall never forget this experience. I truly can't believe I came here on my own. I even lost weight! How perfect is that?

London - more of the magical mystery tour

When I last left you, breathlessly waiting for my next installment, I had spent the evening at an old punk bar. The rest of my trip goes as such:

Day Five

A glorious sunny day with perfect temperatures. I wish I could have captured this weather in a bottle and pulled it out whenever I wanted. Anyway, I spent the morning wandering through Borough market. It's a little like Eastern Market, but bigger. I could have easily gotten lost there, but I had plans - a groundling ticket to see Much Ado About Nothing at the rebuilt Globe. Before my trip, I hadn't had the time to read the play, and because I like surprises, I even blew off Sparknotes. I am very glad that I went in ignorant. The play was a wonderful little romp. I stood up against the stage at stage left, so my view was blocked from time to time. I stood next the a high school principal from New Zealand and his wife. My only regret was that I left my camera at the hotel. My confirmation email stated no cameras. I took a couple of shots with my global phone, but I haven't been able to upload them. I took a break that evening as I rushed back to Skype with my beamish boy.

Day Six

Rain, with a smattering of Mitzi sunshine. I spent the whole day with my new friend Mitzi. We walked through Soho, a ritzy shopping part of town, and a naughty bit of town. We stopped in used record stores. We shopped at more street markets. The day started at St. Paul's in the driving rain, so we did not climb the stairs to the top of the cathedral. It was an endless blast, marred only by the newly formed blisters on my heels from my new shoes. Oh well. We ate dinner at a fab vegan Chinese restaurant and ended the day at a pub in Chalk Farm with Simon and Nic. They cleverly helped me devise a plan to bring Andrew to London, instead of Paris. I would stay in Wales with Mitzi. Then we would move to London, where Andrew would ride in the cab of the Tube with Simon (so sayeth Nic). We could travel to Paris for a couple of days and see the Eiffel Tower and come back to London. Sounds like a plan.

Day Seven

A bit of a wash out. I made it to the National Gallery. The museum is packed with beautiful works, most of it old. I do prefer more modern and less religious pieces. Still, I was very impressed with the Impressionists I saw, plus several Van Goghs, and (my favorite) Cezanne. As I left, the skies opened up and left a deluge on the city, so I took my sore feet back to the hotel.

Day Eight

I dumped the painful shoes and headed Kensingston way. I found the Royal Albert Hall and picked up a few rocks for my son. Then I headed to the Museum of Natural History where I played mommy by proxy and took pictures of fossils and rocks. The building was beautiful and I would love to bring Andrew here. The number of people is completely overwhelming. In the evening, I tried to take the Jack the Ripper tour, but the guide didn't show up. The pouring rain must have had something to do with that.

Day Nine

Can you tell I'm running out of steam. I miss my son desperately and I'm actually ready to get back to routine and move into my new place. I spent the morning, which was sunny at St. Paul's. By the time I got there, I realized that I was touristed out, so I headed to some suggested shopping areas. On the tube from St. Paul's, I discovered something in my hair. I plucked it out, but that rotten little bee stung me, right at my hairline, before I flung it to the ground. While shopping, nothing caught my fancy. I must have been tired. I headed back to Camden and did some serious damage, including a pair of brown Doc Martens and a pair of purple Doc Martens boots. I've been told that one can ever have too many pairs of Doc Martens, so now I have three pairs. Fish and chips for dinner at Oliver's was okay. The portion was huge and I'm afraid I wasted a lot of food. By this point, I was whipped and ready to turn in, so back to Skype with Andrew and sweet sleep.

I'll save the last day for tomorrow.

London - a post from the rain

I've been so busy that I've not written about the other days of the trip. Tonight's on-again, off-again rain will prevent me from going on my intended pub walk, so I might as well write.

Day Three
I went to a concert, not a big deal.

Wait, this is the whole reason I came to London - to see Squeeze perform at Rochester Castle!!!!!!

Simon and his wife Nic picked me as I "hitchhiked" along the road and we headed off on our hour long journey. The scenery wasn't particularly striking, so Nic and I chatted pretty much the whole way. We parked a long way from the venue and walked, maybe two miles. The weather was cloudy and cold. I was wearing a long tank top dress, my jean jacket, and sandals. I was fairly miserable for a while. Once we got to the actual castle, we ran into other members of the Squeeze family: Sue, Garry, Val, Gill, and Mitzi. Rumor had it that the sound check would be open to the public. Before that happened, the ladies (and Garry) wandered down to a restaurant just down the gate from the castle. Most order food, but Nic and packed a lunch, so neither of us ate and just order half-pints. Back to the castle ground where I met Tami and her friend Diane and to the start of the sound check. The sound check was interesting in that portions of it were silent, audible only to the guys via their headsets. Once they turned on the sound, there were Italian teenage tourists who were both mocking the band and dancing to them. I did not hit anybody, I promise. We ate on the lawn, drank red wine (and I was fine), and then bellied up to the barrier in order to secure our spot in the very front.

The Lightening Seeds opened the night with an acoustic show. There was one song I knew (the name of which is now gone) and I tried really hard, but I damn near fell asleep during their set. I was, however, fully awake for the main act. From the opening chords of "Black Coffee in Bed," I danced and sang with other Squeeze fanatics. Finally, I felt like I wasn't just taking people to indulge me in my musical fantasy. I was surrounded by like-minded friends.

The show ended and Simon and Nic had to work in the morning, so we took the long walk back to the car. By this time, my toes were nicely frozen. I dozed on and off in the back seat. We talked about the Casey Anthony verdict and we listened to BBC.

My only mild regret - these were the only Squeeze shows of late where I did not get a picture with Glenn :(

Day Four

I love the Tate Modern. No, let me restate that. I LOVE THE TATE MODERN!!!!!!!!!!!!! It was beautiful: the Miro exhibit, the Lichtenstein paintings, everything. It was on this day that I seriously believed that I could live in a city like London. The choice of cultural events is mind-boggling. Lunch was out-of-control delicious: fettuccine with wild mushrooms, red chard, and aged Pecorino. Wash that down with a chardonnay and top it off with two scoops of sea salt caramel ice cream and caramel sauce. Oh yeah!

That evening, I went to a pub called the Hope and Anchor to meet Mitzi and see her friends the Glamweazels. She had put my name on the guest list (a first in my life) and I got there a little late. The band was quite good, but the set was short. I met yet another Squeeze fan - Jim. Mitzi had to leave early, but she put Jim in charge of making sure I was safely returned to my train, which he did.

London - Days 2

I was so worried that I'd sleep in super late on Tuesday. Everytime I've ever flown to Europe, the first full night's sleep usually lasts until noon the next day. Plus, I was really wired after the show at the Pelton Arms, so I'm sure I didn't fall asleep until 1 or 1:30. Tuesday saw me wake up around 7:00. That gave me plenty of time for a leisurely morning. I took breakfast in the coffee shop attached to the hotel. The continental breakfast is all carbs: croissant or pain au chocolat, corn flakes, juice or coffee/tea, and toast. It fills my belly and I returned to my room to wait for maintenance to come adjust the shower temperature, which was ice cold. Once fixed, I showered and headed out the door.

On Tuesday, I intended to go to the Tate Modern. I got distracted before I started on my quest; I saw the Tower Bridge off in the not too far distance, so I just walked in that general direction. I eventually got there and walked around the Tower grounds. The weather was quite chilly and I wasn't dressed appropriately (the story of my London trip), so I didn't go to the top of the bridge. I told myself I'd wander back on a sunnier day.

The evening was spent with my erstwhile host Simon who took me to Greenwich (via boat) for a quick Squeeze tour. First the plague commemorating Squeeze's first gig and then to the Anchor and Hope where Glenn had been doing Tuesday gigs for almost two years. There, we had a bit to eat and drink. We then zoomed into central London (this time on train) for a peek at Big Ben, Parliament, Piccadilly, Trafalgar, and the National Gallery.

Back to the hotel to rest up for the next day and Rochester!

London Day 1

The one thing I haven't really been able to do is blog about London. Well, it's Sunday night, it's been raining off and on all day, and my heels are blistered to tears. Tonight is as good as any to write about my first six days in London.

Day 1

I am happy to say that my flight arrived a half-hour early. After a long, but delightful lay-over in Philly (thanks Erica, Marty, and Finn), I was very anxious to get to London. Immigration and customs were a breeze. I figured that my journey to the hotel would be the same because my FB friend, Simon, had given me excellent instructions on how to navigate the Tube from Heathrow to my hotel. The only problem was my luggage. Of course, I had over-packed. Of course, there were no lifts at a couple of the stations. Thankfully, angelic gentlemen helped me carry my bag to the top of the stairs. On the way home, I will be taking a cab to the airport.

Once I checked into my lift-free hotel, I zoomed to the post office to exchange some traveler's cheques. Apparently, the post office here offers every service possible: utility payments, money exchange, bank accounts. Anyway, Simon had said that he would be by my hotel around 4:30 for food and drinks, so I rushed back to shower and change. When he got there, he had a little surprise for me: a Squeeze gig at the Pelton Arms. It is a small, intimate setting. We first grabbed a little food at the Cutty Sark and then back to the pub, where the guys were running through a quick sound check. Glenn caught my eye, gave me a big, surprised, happy face. After the sound check, he stopped to chat for just a minute - big hug and kiss greeting. Then, the crowd started to fill in. I began to meet many of the names I had been seeing on Facebook and the Glenn listserve forever: Mitzi, Mark, David. I was feeling a little jet-lagged and shy, so I just soaked up the atmosphere. The wait wasn't long. The band ripped into a vigorous set and I was lucky enough to be directly up front, about four feet from Chris Difford's nose. I can't even tell you all of what they played. The best for me was Labeled With Love - which I had never heard because they don't play it in the States. I pointed that fact out to Glenn and he agreed immediately. That was probably the best Squeeze gig I had ever experienced.

I'm kind of tired right now, so I'll play a little catch up tomorrow.

Light bulb moment

Twenty-four years ago, I set out to study for a year in Paris; it had been a long-time dream of mine. Just before I left, I entered into my first relationship and fell in love with my first boyfriend. The only thing I had wanted more than to go to Paris was to have a boyfriend. My fear of being alone and without a boyfriend completely sabotaged my study abroad experience. I suffered from panic attacks, cried constantly, and finally arranged to go home after 6 weeks. I was embarrassed and sad. And, to be honest, I'm not really sure that, internally, I have ever fully recovered at the shame I felt.

Twenty-four years later, I stand on the edge of divorce, the polar opposite of being in one's first relationship, though there is a boy at home I love. I find myself in another large European city, this time London. Unlike my Paris experience, I am not living with a family, nor do I have a roommate. I have come here without a traveling companion. I worried for quite some time that 20-year old Toni would emerge from the recesses of my psyche. I thought seriously about canceling the trip. Needless to say, I didn't because I am writing this from a hotel room in London (Camden), listening to the morning songs of delivery trucks and shopkeepers preparing for the day.

Instead of anxiety and fear, I am filled with awe, and contentment. The thought of being here for 10 days on my own is no longer scary. How can that be? During breakfast, I read an article from the October edition of The Sun (yes, I'm a little behind in my reading, but what's new). The article was titled "Simply Being Aware" by Abhishktananda and it struck me as perfect. In this article, he says

The mind...realizes more and more its inability to say "I am this or that; I am this person or that person." For in the very moment at which the thought appears that I am this or that, this person or that person, then the manifistation with which I have automatically tried to identify myself in the flow of consciousness has fled away from me - but I continue...."I am," and there is no need for me to strive in order to find this "I am." I am not an "I" searching for itself.

I started this journey thinking that I would find myself. As if I were lost. Reading this article over Corn Flakes this morning, I realized that things can be much easier than I make them. I'm not lost, no matter how poetic it sounds. I just have to open my arms and welcome myself to my own existence. For this moment, my life is in this little hotel room and a week from today it will be in Windsor. I must remember that I am in the driver's seat and set the pace. If I don't like the direction, it's my job to turn the wheel.

Interesting new NPR series

Okay, so the series hasn't officially started, but NPR has started requesting submissions. NPR would like listeners to contribute to a series its calling Your Brain on Kids. Perhaps this is a sign of the fundamental shift that has occurred in my brain since becoming a mom. Additionally, I've been struggling for writing ideas and would love to have something published somewhere. I thought if a topic cropped up that fit my life, I would, of course, try to contribute my voice.

Sadly, the first request for submissions goes out to parents of 1-4 year-olds. I, do however, like the question: Has parenthood changed you? Was there a moment or incident that sparked the realization?

First of all, I don't think anyone can become a parent without undergoing some significant changes. I know that I am more patient and understanding. I am more empathetic and I now know more about rocks than I had ever imagined. I now swear a lot less and I have fully purged television from my life. I've fully come to the realization that a parent's life must have variety and I will soon leave the shell of a marriage that solely revolved around my son.

The second part of the question made me chuckle, because I can clearly remember the very moment I noticed that I had started to see the world through a parent's eyes. I was in the car and the John Mayer song, "No Such Thing" came on. I don't terribly object to the song, so I didn't change the radio. But the line "They love to tell you to stay inside the lines, but somethings are better on the other side." This signals my parental metamorphisis. Andrew has always struggled with his fine-motor skills. Occupational therapists would visit the house and offer advice, especially about how to help Andrew with handling a pencil, crayon, etc. In my world, the ability to color inside the lines represented a growing mastery of particular fine-motor skills. I found myself, in the car alone, tersely offering commentary to the song. I'm sure I said something along the lines, "You know...not everything is about suppressing the spirit and conforming to stifling societal norms. Sometimes, I just need to know that my kid is capable of a complex task."

It was at that moment that I knew I was a mom.

Thing 3

Blogs in school? Sadly, anything closely resembling a host for blogs is blocked in my school. I can see a definite use in my class, in particular my AP Literature class. I can see a blog taking the place of a reader's notebook, with students keeping notes on-line as they progress through a novel or play. Or, I could ask them to reflect on a poem. Sadly, I could read none of that at school and I'd hate to sentence myself to yet more work at home. My only option is to see how I could employ a wiki in my class, a goal I had already set for August. If that framework is viable, I will put that to work in my AP class for the fall. I think my students would respond very enthusiastically to a blog assignment, especially if I don't run that play option too often.

Some of the blogs that I read were not class blogs, but instead blogs about the school day. I am a reflective practitioner of my profession. I regularly read recent, research-based books about teaching. The last thing I want to do is to turn my blog (or start another one) into the day in the life of teaching. I already find that I find myself easily consumed with how needy my students are, both academically and personally. If I wrote about my day, everyday, would it stop the current assault on the teaching profession, creating empathy? I don't think so. I'm interested in so much more in the world and I'm interested in exploring those sides of me. It carries no more interest than maintaining a strict mommy or a strict autism blog. Those issues are not the sole qualities that define who I am.

Would I use a blog for my classes? Yes. Would I maintain a "teacher blog"? No.

Thing 1 and Thing 2

For my regular readers out there (all four or five of you), this post is an assignment for a cousre that I am taking this summer - 23 Things Teachers Need to Know about Web 2.0. My primary reason for taking this course is to fulfill the last CEU requirements I need to maintain my teaching license. I need three credits and this course, when completed, will give me two. My second reason for taking this course is I like to try and stay ahead of the curve. I know that many of my students know more about technology than me. I'm not afraid to ask them questions. I thought that taking this course, I could know something before they do.

I have been keeping (more or less) this blog since 2008. I don't write as much as I would like. Being an English teacher/student council adviser/soon-to-be divorced mom to a mildly autistic son leaves me little time for extras. I have, however, grown quite comfortable writing about nearly any topic. There are, obviously, topics that are verboten - mostly related to my son. The particular details of my divorce are off-limits. Beyond that, why not. We live in a world of 24-hour news and endless streams of reality television. My house is not packed to the ceiling with garbage hoarded over the years, I'm not addicted to anything (okay, maybe Lindt's dark chocolate with sea salt), and I don't pretend to have any musical talents. I do think, however, that I am a pretty decent writer and a good person. Through my writing, if one other person is experiencing something similar to me, than suddenly, we are both less alone and isolated.

I work in a district that is extremely poor. The threat of an EMF looms large on the horizon. Many of my students come from completely chaotic homes. They all have cell phones and MP3 players and yet, when I've tried to design assignments that implement those items (download an audio book), they don't budge. What my students need are mentors. People in their lives who see the value of an education. They need life skills that lead them to do more than shrug their shoulders and quit.

Many of them still don't have computers at home. It's pie-in-the-sky to talk dreamily of technology when each district is facing a $300/student cut next year. I have a lovely Smart board that has been decorating my wall since March. It is unusable because it isn't connected. My data projector remains sadly unmounted from the ceiling and cords are no where to be found. I'd love to engage my students with activities using that bit of technology, but I draw the line at climbing up ladders and using power tools over my head.

Of the two articles, I enjoyed the one by Steve Hargadon the most. The middle school article is clearly a Utopian concoction, as I have never met a class full of 13-year olds mature enough to handle The Grapes of Wrath. The Hargadon article lays out emerging trends that should give people food for thought and also tips for those who are cautiously dipping their toes into the new world's pool.

I'd like to say that technology is not going to be a panacea for kids who don't achieve and schools that have no money. I am also concerned that the uber-enthusiasm for all things technology based will take us down the whole language versus phonics path. The reality has show that the answer to teaching reading falls somewhere in the middle, and, as always, starts at home.

Weighing the options

To be honest, my son has not had a full-force hurricane melt-down in a long time. Probably a couple of months. Each time, the trigger is the same and I, frankly, thought we had dodged a bullet this time.

This past Saturday, I took Andrew to Greenfield Village and the Henry Ford Museum to hang out with my friend Kriss, who drove up from Cleveland for the day. We left the house around 9:00 in the morning and got home around 4:30. We were both whipped. He was, however great. He was friendly and bubbly. He asked good questions at the artisan exhibitions (i.e the pottery house) and was extremely well-behaved. I knew that Sunday would be a lost day because that's just how he is. He needs one full day to recover from a big activity, like a trip to Greenfield Village.

That meant Sunday would be a chill day. His father (will I never move out of this place) had other plans and tried to enforce some errands on the boy. Luckily, I intervened and we stayed at home, read books, looked for four-leaf clovers, and hit the ball off the tee. We got through the day with no temper tantrums.

This morning, I knew immediately that something was not right. He spent the morning rocking on the couch, in a turtle position. He told me he was too tired to go to school. I said he could stay home if he didn't mind running errands and he resoundingly rejected that notion. I promised that I would pick him up a little early, when I finished running my international errands. A promise I kept.

He was fine until he had to brush his teeth. He has a habit of squirting toothpaste all over the sink. I now make him clean it up and that has slowed down the mess. Well, his dad caught the mess tonight and kind of escalated. This led Andrew to threaten to kick his dad and to call both of us "stupid futs" (his version of fuck). He finally calmed down and now I can kind of collect my thoughts.

I had hoped to take him to Mammoth Cave in Kentucky this summer, but after today's display, I just don't know. Perhaps he's ready for the end of the school year on Wednesday and that played a contributing factor. I thought the trip would take three days: one to get there, one to go to the cave, and one to come home. Now, I don't know. I don't want us to be held hostage to the autism, but I need to be realistic. I was hoping to go in August, so he might be fully relaxed by that point. He is bright, friendly, and sweet. He needs to experience the world, to broaden that expressive vocabulary of his. I guess we'll play it by ear and see how he's doing.

A New Tradition

Last week in Andrew's meditation class, the instructor read a book called Have You Filled A Bucket Today . The book is about happiness and how we carry around an invisible bucket with our feelings. It is meant to encourage kindness by filling up other people's buckets with positive words. For my Andrew, I see it as a way to help him build empathy, which is so often lacking in people on the Autism Spectrum.

I decided to create a tradition out of this. I ordered the book and bought a couple of little buckets (remnants of Easter stuff). For the past couple of days, Andrew and I have been filling each others buckets up with loving words and kindness. Plus, he's practicing writing complete sentences, because I am not allowed to see what he's writing ahead of time. He giggles with delight at each note and his ability to show love has just been exploding lately.

I'm a pretty happy mom.

A New Task

Because I have too much free time, I've taken on the task of handling the PR for a major fund raising effort for my school district. My friend John has decided to climb Mt. Denali in order to raise money for student activities, such as my Student Council. My bucket list would include climbing a mountain, but I'm afraid that my spinal osteoporosis has nixed that idea. Therefore, I shall both help John in his endeavor and live vicariously through him. Should you be a regular reader here, please check out this post for more information. I promise that more is coming.

http://climbingforsuccess.blogspot.com/2011/04/aint-no-mountain-high-enough.html

Glenn Tilbrook - Evanston April 4

Last night I fed my need for a Glenn Tilbrook/Squeeze fix. My girlfriend Laurie and I drove to Evanston, Illinois to catch an acoustic show from Glenn at a venue called Space. We both took the day off and Laurie drove.

The GPS on her phone eventually took us along Lakeshore Drive and needless to say, we grew envious of the vibrancy that emanated from every pore of Chicago. We arrived at our hotel before the room was available and our stomachs rumbling for food. Luckily, there was a pub directly across. It was called Tommy Nevin's and it will crop up later in my story. From lunch, we walked three blocks into the shopping district and looked for the venue. We also stopped in a jewelry shop. I bought a swish pair of sterling silver hoop (large) earrings and Laurie bought a beautiful necklace. The time told us it was finally time to check in at the hotel, so we walked back.

I showered and read while Laurie napped. Finally, it was time to head out for dinner and then to the show. We chose to eat at Union Pizzeria, which is attached to the show venue. We dined on a delicious thin crust pizza with basil pesto, broccoli, red onion, sun-dried tomato, and goat cheese. Yummy! No time or room for dessert, the doors were opening and we had general admission tickets.

We wandered to the first row on the right of the stage. Our seats placed us in a way that we would have to watch Glenn's backside for the whole show. I chatted with the couple next to us, Adam and Olga, and then Glenn came on.

He started with an explanation that United had lost his luggage and his two guitars. He then launched into a delightful 25 minute set that went as follows:

1. Monkey Up the Tree
2. Take Me I'm Yours
3. This is Where You Ain't
4. Chatline Larry (apparently about one of his oldest boys and his phone habits)
5. Wild World (covering that great Cat Stevens songs)
6. Tongue Like a Knife
7. Oh Well
8. Vanity Fair
9. If I Didn't Love You
10. Untouchable
11. Harper Valley PTA
12. Introvert
13. Another Nail
14. Good-bye Girl (on electric guitar with assistance on the acoustic from a guy in the audience)
15. Cool for Cats (delivered in a droll, spoken word manner)
16. Best of Times
17. Tempted
18. Some Fantastic Place
19. Is That Love?
20. Vicky Verky
21. The Truth
22. Annie, Get You Gun
23. Up the Junction
24. Slap and Tickle
25. Pulling Mussels

End of show - just wonderful. As always, he came out and chatted to everyone. I told him that I was coming to England to see the Rochester Castle show. I posed for pictures and then, we left. Happily, the night doesn't end here.

We returned to our hotel and quickly decided to grab a drink at the pub across the street, Tommy Nevins. We take a seat, grab drinks, and who walks (now with his luggage) into the bar? Glenn and an old friend. Glenn turns and sees me, comes over, asks what we're drinking, and invites us to an empty table that is larger than our table. Over the next two hours, we chat, throw popcorn at each other (he could catch it, I could not), drink, and laugh. Someone gave him a gift bag that include a large hollow chocolate thing and a small metal mallet to crack it open. Out tumbled more chocolate delights that no one wanted. When asked what he was going to do with the hammer, he had no clue. I urged him to pull a Spinal Tap with it, which elicited a big laugh.

He had to get up the next morning at 7 to fly to New York, so we parted company around 1:00 a.m. It was a great night.

Early jobs

Earlier today, I did a really goofy thing. I conducted a FB search for a guy on whom I had a tremendous crush like 16 years ago. I don't know what gets into me sometimes. He lived at an apartment complex where I was a leasing agent, just before I became a teacher. We both liked each other, but other than one make out session, it didn't go very far. I think he was seriously involved with somebody.

It got me thinking about all those early jobs I held before I dived into my career. That job as a leasing agent was the absolute best for a 25 year single woman. I met several men and ended up with two boyfriends because of this job. I had an active social life, hanging out with the young professionals who lived there. We went to the bar, played beach volleyball; I had a blast.

I'm wondering what early job did you have that, in retrospect, was the right job to have at that moment in your life?

An education beyond school walls

I have been a Student Council adviser for all 15 years of my teaching career. In my darkest moments, my contact with Student Council members has been the only thing that kept me in the teaching profession. Along with my students, one organization has most profoundly assisted me as an adviser, Michigan Association of Student Council/Honor Societies. Through this wonderful organization, I have met many dedicated adults and students, all striving to make their schools better places. The conferences offered by MASC/MAHS gave my students the necessary training to be better organizers, better leaders. Given that I teach full time, I never have time to train my kids they way these conferences do.

For the first few years of my career, it seems that we always had money to send students to all conferences, including the expensive State Conference in Traverse City. Hamtramck High School's Student Council was even climbing into the well-recognized status. We hosted conferences, we presented at conferences, we won awards. Then, the money dried up and I became a mom and my time dried up. Needless to say, both Student Council and I have suffered from some serious doldrums lately.

This year has been different. I have a group of amazing seniors, in particular my Executive Board. I love them like they are my own daughters. They are driven, creative, and smart young ladies. Earlier in the year, they devised a plan to raise money for both us and a charity. They made buttons and called them "A-wear-ness" buttons. I won't go into all the details, but it was a rip roaring success.

These wonderful young women decided to present this idea at the MASC/MAHS Regional Connect Conference we attended today. Presentations from the eight regional conferences would be chosen to present at the state conference. Unsurprising to me, my girls were invited to present at States. The other students who went (a grand total of ten) also want to go because they caught that Leadership Beat. Not counting transportation, I now need to insure that we raise $2500 by March 25th.

Okay friends, both virtual and real - I need your help. I am tired of not taking my kids on these trips. I am tired of missed opportunities. I want a little cushion (who doesn't, right). If you feel so inclined, please help us hit this monetary goal. Yes, we plan on collecting as many cans as we can between now and then. We plan on hitting Hamtramck businesses. But you can help. Five dollars, ten dollars, any amount you can afford would be greatly appreciated.

Leave a comment here, and we can figure out how your donation can get to us. Or leave me a message at FB. My real identity is not stealthily hidden. The kids and I would greatly appreciate it.

Random thoughts while contempleting snow and loss

I've spent the last two days in Florida. Yesterday, I went through pictures and scanned a few. I'm struck by how often my father and his cousins and their parents gathered for family gatherings and parties. There were also tons of pictures from family vacations.

This lead me to a conversation I had on-line with a friend last night. I mentioned that my family took only three family vacations, along with a handful of short weekend trips. He mentioned that is wasn't really unusual to look back at this moment in my life and maybe look for some truth or to even question my own memory. I responded that I am far more interested in looking for the present truth.

That sounds mildly profound, but also pretentious. Does it have any meaning?

In this time of sorrow, I find myself missing my son, my friends, and the snow. I'm missing out on a collective experience, a memory that they'll share. Here, we've been sitting around my mom's house, staring at the television, clearing bookshelves, closets. My dad has been cremated, so there's no funeral. It's the bustle in the house that Emily Dickinson writes about. This is an odd feeling. I expected something different. I don't know what I expected. What truth do I derive out of this?

Looking at the pictures, examining the hundreds of recipes that my father typed up for me, and parsing my feelings, I am going to take away the truth that I want my house full of people for dinners, games, and laughs. I want my gas tank full of gas, and train/plane tickets in my hand to see the world. These are the truths from the past that I want to drive my present. I want bright, vivid memories, for myself and Andrew. So far, I haven't done such a good job. I'll have to try harder.